I just don't understand...again

When I was younger I remember making a comment about "hating" something, probably sweet pickles or something silly like that, and my Grandpa Tony saying "WOW, you don't like them that much that you HATE them, because HATE is a pretty strong word. 

This has since impacted me significantly, in fact I find myself saying the same to my kids...

Dictionary.com defines 'dislike' as "to regard with displeasure, antipathy, or aversion" and 'HATE' as 'to dislike intensely or passionately; feel extreme aversion for or extreme hostility toward".

There are many things I 'dislike'...hose in the summer, drivers who don't use their turn signals, yard work...but I honestly cannot think of anything or anyone that I can say I HATE.

I do believe that I am the object of some one's HATE...and this truly scares me because I cannot believe the capacity at which this person HATES me...and to think that at one time this person said the total opposite.

For those of you who know me...or those of you just starting to, you will find that I tend to wear 'rose colored glasses' and constantly try to look on the bright side and numerous other optimistic cliches.  But there is one situation where the only positive...the ONLY POSITIVES is that we did make two of the most amazing kids in the world!

I just cannot understand his capacity for HATE me and at every opportunity insult, belittle and 'fight' with me, and there really is no purpose for it.

There are times when I find myself wishing my kids were 18 so that our interactions wouldn't be necessary, but then I can't get over how quickly my kids have already grown up...I don't want to speed it up anymore...I just wish that we could truly just be civil to one another...I mean seriously it does no good to anyone...

Especially those two amazing kids!

Interactive Post-Bumper Stickers

So, I have this funny thing about bumper stickers...I don't know why...but I do...oh and Vanity Plates but we will save that for another post.

This is going to be an interactive post...so please share your favorite Bumper Sticker!

Mine are (in no particular order)

"I drive like a Cullen."

"Never judge a book by its movie"  I WOULD put this one on my car!

"They say I have ADD...oh look a chicken!"

"Gone Crazy, Back Soon."

"Some Heros Where Capes...Mine Wear Kevlar" (this was an advert for the Marines...but I figure if you change 'Kevlar' to "Combat Boots"...it could apply to all the armed services!

"Alaska Girls ROCK!"

"Hang up and drive"

OH...my sister sent me this one...."Hike faster I hear banjo music."

"If you can't stand behind our troops, please feel free to stand in front of them."

Your Turn...share your favorite Bumper Sticker!

No Greater Love...

“Greater love hath no man than this that a man lay down his life for his friends." - John 15:13


...Or for complete strangers
     ...Or for, at times, an ungrateful nation

“The Soldier, above all other people, prays for peace,

for he must suffer and bear the deepest wounds and scars of war.”

- General Douglas MacArthur

A few weeks ago I saw a headline at my preferred online local news resource, AZCentral.com, which caught my eye:

“Outrage over Ruling against Slain Marine’s Father”

As I read the article I became even more upset…apparently a court in Baltimore, Maryland ruled that Albert Snyder, who lost his 20 year old son Lance Corporal Matthew Snyder in Iraq, was to pay some of the court costs of a church that he sued for protesting while he laid his son to rest.


Mr. Snyder was:

ordered510.80 to Fred Phelps, leader of the Westboro Baptist Church in Topeka, Kansas, an anti-gay group that travels the country picketing military funerals.

–quoted from newspaper article, emphasis on ‘ordered’ mine.

Apparently the church group feels that military deaths are God’s punishment for America’s social tolerance of homosexuality.

WAIT!

...last I looked my Bible,
         aka the Word of God,
                 aka Basic Instructions for Leaving Earth,
                           aka The Book for Me…

States that, “We”, meaning Christians (aka perhaps those of Westboro Baptist Church) are not to judge others (Matthew 7:1-3), in fact the protesters are behaving as the Pharisees did in Jesus’ time. In fact Jesus (aka Christ) said that HE came FOR THE SINNERS!!! (Mark 2:17)


So…is now the time I share that I am NOT a theologian.

1. I do not ‘bible thump’,
2. I will and do call myself a “Christian”,
3. but I am by no means perfect or even come close to claiming to be such.
4. I say often that I "know it, in my knower!"
5. In fact there are times when I d r e a d being called a “Christian” because some of the things people do in the name of Christianity, like protesting at a soldier’s funeral, are the very things that turn people away from Christianity.

But even if I was a great (or even mediocre) Biblical Theologian…that still would be

NO reason, NO justification

 for me to protest during a FUNERAL! 

Although one might argue that even this blog post is a form of protest.

Regardless as to how one feels about

God…

or death…

or judgment…

or even our ‘right’ as Americans to ‘free speech’

I would hope that our right to use

our brains

our compassion,

our hearts,

our minds,

our common sense

would

STOP us from being so cruel as to PROTEST,

essentially ridicule…belittle…mock,

the death of ANYONE,

especially a young man…

                        a young SOLDIER!






Ok, I do have to ask …
Where is the rational that ‘emotional abuse’ is worth a cost of

$11 million…

that is the amount that Mr. Snyder sued the church for

…but to what end?

Is $11 million…or

                                      $5 million

                                        (the award was reduced on an appeal) or

               any dollar amount

worth the life of a child?

I wonder if God is thinking...

 “Gee, I wonder what I can sue ‘Christians’ for,

for using (essentially) MY name

as they do these horrible things against each other?!”

I, for one, am thankful that HIS court of appeals, understands that I am not perfect (grace) and that HE loves me in spite of myself (MORE GRACE, also called MERCY)…because just being

 ‘human’

 is  (essentially) it’s own form of protest against

ALL

that

is

GOD!

“But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” – Romans 5:8

And when the day is done...

My Momma’s still my biggest fan…



That is a line from a Jessica Andrews song that was popular several years ago, and it came to mind when my mom signed up to be my first stalker follower.

Although does it count when I was sitting next to her showing her how to sign up?

Seriously, my mom is a ‘kick in the butt’… and she is one of my best girlfriends, loudest cheerleaders and greatest mentor!



Okay honestly...

YES!

She is still my mom, and we still have ‘those’ moments

(can you hear my eyes roll?)

but anyone who is a mom knows that it is an occupation that you never really retire from.

(Nor would many of us want to).

But I have to say that as I have gotten older grown up matured gone through life and become a mom myself the relationship that her and I have has really evolved into something wonderful.



When I was married, through circumstances I became separated from her and she had every right to turn me away when I came crying at her doorstep about the SHOCK of what lead to the end of my marriage…but she embraced me, and supported me (financially too) and held me up so many times that…she was literally my LEANING POST

(inside joke mom…do you get it!?).

So can I tell you how AweSome she is…I mean besides all that stuff I just said…?



When she married my father (The Captain), she left her home with 5 other sisters to move several 1000s of miles away. In the first few years, two babies showed up and her husband is called up to go overseas…she learns to drive, volunteers at the Red Cross AND takes care of two little ones in the midst of horrible politics that ‘attack’ families of military members.


I remember very clearly wondering why protestors where egging our car and yelling that our dad was a ‘baby-killer’, while sitting next to my baby sister. Although I cannot recall what Mom said, it was positive and comforting enough that I felt safe and secure with her…I now know that she was even more confused and frightened, didn’t these people understand that danger HER husband was in, what would happen to her babies if something happened to HIM?

I remember being in elementary school when she joined the Air Force herself,

YES! My mom wore combat boots!

She built a solid career and fought for that career when others wished to demean and threaten her and her family.

I remember her creativity when it came to my sister’s and mine various struggles…how to make Easter fun when one of your children can’t have chocolate…

By the way, Carob and sugar free has changed SO much in the last 20 years.

Hey…wanna know a great deterrent against experimenting with drugs as a teenager?

When your mom is packing HEAT as a DEA liaison!

Just Say “NO!” was easy with that realization.

Don't get me wrong, like I said before we have our rough patches

(HELLO, she is still my MMMMAAAAHHHHOOOMMMM),

and honestly we still do…but they really pale when I think about how she has always been there…during the great moods and the crappy ones

(hers and mine!)

Now that I am a mom…I value her all the more…especially at times as a single parent, when you need to have ‘back up’ against a protesting teenager.

(It is a family trait that we don’t allow our kids to “hang out” at the mall.)

But I also value her ‘ear’…am I doing the right thing…I don’t understand this in that paperwork…can you help me…MOVE our house…in 15 days…during the kids Spring Break...

HELP!! PLEASe!!!


I realize that I ask SO much of her…SO very much of her and I just hope that being the ‘biggest’ fan has great benefits…

and that I can become the woman, the mom that she is to me, for my children.

Image by Maury Shulman, do NOT COPY!

To say "THANK YOU", really seems to lack the feelings I truly mean…

but remember Mom, I promised you long ago to make certain the nurses at your assisted living home were HOTTIES…and I am certain even then you could teach them lots.

hahaha-snort-hahaha

So I guess you could say that when the day is done I am my momma's biggest fan!

Blog Block

Yes, already?  Sad, isn’t it?  Kinda typical of my ADD...I have a great idea, great start, but struggle with the follow-through, sounds like some sort of sports team.

But I wonder, "How this is possible, it is only my 4th post?"  And the other thought running around in my head, “Shame on me, get started on something I have been talking about for at least the last year and...” Sad but true, I have...

-cue epic music intro-
 “BLOG BLOCK”
 -cue epic music ending-

which really sounds like some horrible physical aliment

that might involve some deep personal thinking or reading…and prunes.

(TMI?!)

I guess it isn’t really BLOCK, but more...

-cue quasi-epic music intro- 
“Blog Topic Confusion”
-cue quasi-epic music ending-

As in “what do I write about next?”

DO I...

• ‘rant’ about a particular news article I read recently, because I do like to share my opinions (and that article….ARGH!  Protesting at a military funeral, how rude!)?

OR

• share about my family, who completely amaze and humble me, (while I probably drive them into more therapy and self medication.)

AND OF COURSE

• there is my photography, which is my recent discovery, or rather, RE-discovery. (mental note, must get around to editing more pictures soon!)
  

I will most likely cycle through all of them (and much more).  I have already shared my thoughts 'ranted' about recent news and I did share some photography so now…

-insert sounds of spinning contest wheel here-

MY FAMILY

(you poor, poor people…or rather my poor, poor family)

What do you think??? Please feel free to comment…even if you don’t have a gmail or blogger account…you should be able to share an ‘any mouse’ comment (FYI ‘any mouse’ = anonymous)

I agree...

“To me, photography is an art of observation.

It’s about finding something interesting in an ordinary place…

I’ve found it has little to do with the things you see and

everything to do with the way you see them”

– Elliott Erwitt

I read this quote just the other day and felt it really summed up my feelings when it comes to photography. I like to get down and dirty and angle and twist myself into all sorts of pretzel poses to get a unique picture.

Please allow me to share some of the way I see things…

Please DO NOT COPY this image!

The picture above was taken looking up at a clear BLUE sky, while laying down on the GRAVEL (ouch!), underneath the back bumper of this beautiful and FABULOUS RED Thunderbird.

Please DO NOT COPY this image either!

This is a Dodge Charger 'Super Bee'...again from a rather unique angle...and with a rather unique title..."Charger Butts Drive Me Nutts" is what I call this one.  This is actually one of many that this gent owns...and I hope to this pic is only the first of many he allows me to take of his collection.  Oh and this one was taken sitting off center and behind the back bumper...I think I was able to get the grass stains out of my jeans on the third wash.

Please DO NOT COPY this image or else you will be 'SNIVELING'!

I can't help but think of a Hummer as a modern day version of the 'Sherman Tank' that The Captain (aka Dad) wished he could have bought my sis and I when we started to drive.  I know that I wish I could afford one for PixieChick (aka my daughter), although I don't think she would be able to see over the sterling wheel, even at 16 she is still a PIXIE! 

As for where I was to take this picture...like it isn't obvious?!

I just don't understand...

John Edwards? Tiger Woods? And now Jesse James? And that is only the last few months! And it is just a very small example, these are the ones ‘we’ know about…what about the many other’s whose names are not in the society papers.

Why can’t some men just keep their zippers up? Does a man really think about sex so much that the impulse can’t wait? Good grief, did they really think they wouldn’t get caught? Does one ever STOP and think…if I do this…what will happen? There is always the word, “NO!” Or how about not even putting yourself in that situation to begin with, what do I mean by this? No one-on-one situations with a woman that is NOT your wife/girl friend/significant other.

So in this case the men are not the only ones ‘guilty’, please like the women that fooled around with these men didn’t know they were already married. REALLY, had they been HIDING under a rock for the last 10-15 years?

And now each of them is trying to stretch their 15 minutes of fame out as long as they can. Seriously, one of Tiger’s many women wanted an apology from him, really lady? REALLY? YOU should be apologizing to the wife and two kids! And after cavorting with her daughter’s stuffed animals wearing just a men’s pressed shirt, in the pages of GQ, who is going to take Reille Hunter seriously now…at one time she was a documentary filmmaker.

I am offended that I share the same name with the gal that Jesse James messed around with, and SHAME ON HIM. My heart breaks for Sandra, especially after all the amazing things she has said recently about him…I think Jesse needs to change his name to “HEEL” or perhaps “IDIOT!”, yes I am thinking about worse names he should be called, but I am a Mom!

I seriously just don’t understand, and yet I have a few thoughts about perhaps why men choose this route, but I must save those for future rants. But right now, I pray for those women and children who were apparently not important enough to these men to have given them the strength to just turn and walk away! The women who are now wondering why themselves and are perhaps hurting very deeply, but who will tuck in their wonderful children tonight (Yes even Miss Sandra, as a step mother). Who will crawl into a HUGE bed and perhaps pile up the pillows so it isn’t SO big. Who someday, soon I pray, will realize that perhaps women are in fact the stronger of the sexes.

I know this is a ‘heavy’ topic for one of my first posts, but it is something that has just been nagging me and bouncing around in my head. I know that both men and women can be participants in infidelity, but it just seems lately there is an epidemic of men not being faithful and women who consciously mess around with men they know are married.

In the beginning...

In a fit of not being able to sleep I venture forth to finally create "MY BLOG" (cue Epic Music Soundtrack) and I have already confused myself with how to make my blog "me"(care of  Instructions For Blog Design) so please bear with my while I figure that one out. 

Until then, I will take a moment to read some one of your minds (Miss CW specifically) "It's about time Lady!"  Yup, my cellphone might be 2004 and my car might be 1997 but my random thoughts, adventures and someday soon photos are now in 2010...I am BLOGGING, or it is I am a BLOGGER, whichever it is...Look out world here I rant!